From starlit nights of burning neon to quiet rooms and county roads, Sunlight Flickers explores memories newly unearthed.
In advance of Diurnal’s release on Friday September 30, its first lyrics are some of the most vivid from the upcoming project. Mining the past for content, Sunlight Flickers’ evokes nights saturated in colour and mistakes exposed under harsh daylight. Perhaps it’s fitting then that the original version was in limbo for 17 years after being written.
Created in December 2004, Sunlight Flickers wasn’t rediscovered until the Fireteddy National Library (opens in new tab) was put together. Knowing Diurnal’s title and themes of revisiting the past already, it presented a moment of serendipity I couldn’t ignore. After painstakingly editing and re-editing the lyrics multiple times with much help from my friend Carol, I arrived at the final version being released today.
As a bonus, two pieces written during the sessions for Diurnal have also been included. Inspired by students from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School (opens in new tab) in Parkland, Florida, Bridge Of Opportunity is about finding resolve in the face of seemingly overwhelming opposition. On a very different note, Transference is about being driven by general desires vs. attraction and realizing the difference between them.
A portion of Sunlight Flickers’ evolution can also be viewed in an alternate version below. Although it isn’t the original (opens in new window,) the piece contains many similar elements and was the first attempt at an update for Diurnal. The end result is something that exists between the two.
For more information on my new group of lyrics dropping a week from today, be sure to read the official announcement post.
Lyrics Content
03. Transference
04. Sunlight Flickers (alternate version)
Sunlight Flickers
I’ve seen you cry on starlit nights
Beneath red fireworks set alight
Burning neon, streaking bright
It’s time to dry your eyes
Returning memories kept enslaved
Exposing dreams our lives betrayed
Morning holds no hiding place
For monsters not confined
It’s always on my mind
With what gets pushed aside
From trampolines and swimming pools
Some dirty thoughts in quiet rooms
All the things we couldn’t do
When nothing comes for free
This haunted house, your favourite clothes
Forgotten places no one knows
City streets and county roads
Each truth that floats downstream
With flaws in our beliefs
It’s all in what we grieve
Now if this sunlight flickers
Will we be guided by the sparks?
Another memory triggered
We’re always stumbling in the dark
Reflecting as the day begins
There’s nothing much of consequence
Looking back on where we’ve been
It keeps us well-preserved
With honest fears that get pushed down
All rising to the surface now
Caustic views once disavowed
Have finally been unearthed
Compounding what still hurts
But how much is it worth?
Bridge Of Opportunity
I can’t believe the news today
Although the things we need may seem so far away
Hold your breath, there’s no retreating
When the past won’t stop repeating
There’s a truth in what this fiction can’t portray
We’re pushing through from underneath
In spite of everything they want us to believe
It takes great courage for assistance
A little time to gain resistance
There’s still a structure that can keep us on our feet
You can’t hope to change the future if you never plant a seed
In the middle of such chaos, rising up from tragedy
We all struggle to remember when it’s hardest to believe
They built a bridge of opportunity, a bridge of opportunity to seize
It doesn’t take a crystal ball
To know the future comes from how our past evolves
Save your breath until you need it
If this feels wrong or you’ve been cheated
The weight we shoulder only strengthens our resolve
You can’t hope to change the future if you never plant a seed
In the middle of such chaos, rising up from all our grief
We all struggle to remember when it’s hardest to believe
They built a bridge of opportunity, a bridge of opportunity to seize
It drags us down but in the wreckage
Coming up above the flames
We can move past all our sorrow
Stretching far beyond the pain
It’s our instinct to keep fighting
Even when we feel betrayed
What’s left to say? What’s left to say?
I can’t believe the news today
Although these things we need may seem so far away
You can’t hope to change the future if you never plant a seed
In the middle of such chaos, rising up from tragedy
We all struggle to remember when it’s hardest to believe
They built a bridge of opportunity, a bridge of opportunity to seize
A bridge of opportunity to seize
A bridge of opportunity to seize
Transference
I never really loved you
Rewired to play pretend
While some might call it desperate
It isn’t my defense
Though I was feeling lonely
Still struggling to connect
My object of obsession
There’s nothing to profess
It’s time to move along
It’s time to move along again
These false emotions never end
I only seem to shake them
When I’m not being rejected
That’s how it starts to shift
With feelings made evasive
My mind begins to drift
It rises out of nowhere
Until I’m out of line
Eclipsing any reason
I can’t say I’m surprised
It’s time to move along
It’s time to move along again
These false emotions never end
I only seem to shake them…
When thoughts all interact
These thoughts come back to flood my head
They only seem to transfer when
I start to feel alone again
Moving out of sight, it’s easy to forget
Imprisoned in my mind but I’m trying to progress
Moving out of sight, it’s easy to forget
Imprisoned in my mind so there isn’t any rest
It’s time to move along
It’s time to move along again
These false emotions never end
I only seem to shake them…
When thoughts all interact
These thoughts come back to flood my head
They only seem to transfer when
I start to feel alone again
I start to feel alone again
I start to feel alone again
I start to feel my loneliness
Sunlight Flickers (alternate version)
I’ve seen your face in sunset light
The neon glow of city nights
Nothing’s wrong, now it’s alright
From what we’ve memorized
Distortions come in many ways
Illusions keep our past enslaved
Morning brings this bitter taste
No shadow can confine
Why weren’t you ever mine?
Why weren’t you ever mine?
It’s lovely like a yellow rose
This blooming heart for those who know
Moving past, the future grows
But you don’t have to leave
So if it’s true your garden’s filled
With things you thought the storm would kill
When I’m right, won’t wait until
It’s hardest to receive
Now if this sunlight flickers
Will we be guided by the sparks?
Another memory triggered
To leave us stumbling in the dark
When time informs what we become
Our time apart feels cumbersome
It’s funny now but I feel dumb
For running straight to you
With thoughts that I would once reject
Where feelings from our past are kept
I know it’s such a disconnect
From what I still can’t do
In running from the truth
It all comes back to you